Saturday, December 11, 2004
im so tired, but unless i pick up my books and start revising i would be even worse off next year
im drained working at least 6 days a week. not that working itself is tough, to me, washing my own uniform and not being able to come online is worse.
for example today. i worked 8 hours, came home, immediately sat down here, and have been here for 3 hours straight even though im supposed to wash and dry my uniform for work tomorrow and bathe. computer withdrawal symptoms ?
sounds like some eating disorder. or rather, the slimming obsession. you buy some slimming pill, hoping it'll work, but all youre doing is actually nothing, coz you bought that product coz of the marvellous way it is marketed, and besides marvelling about how its gonna work for your figure and popping the pills, you do nothing else.
you eat the same amount, work out the same amount (which is practically not at all), and going on like that, of course you wont slim down.
look, this is common sense.
everyone knows that the only way to slim down is to exercise and eat healthy, but whether you choose to believe it or not is another thing.
slimming pills may work, but they dont work in a very nice way. they reduce the size of your fat cells, but NOT THE AMOUNT. if you dont exercise enough (or at all), the fat cells remain.
the worst part? after a while, the fat cells cant get any smaller. more fat cells are created and downsized , more and more! so after a while, you cannot lose weight/slim down
forever.
too bad they dont write this on the back of the packet (for obvious reasons). but whoever who knows of this unfair truth wouldnt buy slimming pills, i suppose. unless you dont understand english. or youre too obssessed with slimming you cant be bothered about me (and also your own body!)
i know i know, you might protest and say that i dont understand
but thats not true! im fighting against myself too
look, i was supposed to eat healthy starting december. i did , only for 4 days. now im back to my normal, really unhealthy eating ways. it isnt easy to refuse a coke. but i must do it, not for anyone, but myself!
so if you love yourself.. dont hurt yourself.
its really important to love yourself, for unless you do, you wont be able to love anyone
the "i love you"s you say to other people would be so damn shallow and meaningless an ant wouldnt even drown
you would only look out for handsome/pretty people to be with, coz they bring you to a higher level and thus making you feel better about yourself.
sounds familar? i know many people who are like that. im like that too, but im addressing this problem too.
i think coming to terms with myself has made me a little more "myself" - so what if i dont have a boyfriend? its not like anyone would die without one. so what if im ugly? at least i dont look disgusting*. so what if ive no life? its my own affairs. not anyone elses.
i dont care if you think im a fugly slitch coz youre jealous of how happy i am an individual single with a boring life with above average days.
to those naive gurls who think they will die if their boyfriends left them - just go and die okay, you're wasting air.
i will show the world that if i can live without a guy, so can you! boyfriends are temporary anyway, so why kick a big fuss?
i may be digressing here, coz of a misunderstanding recently. shall not talk about it now, its 2 am.
i need her to hate me more. lets play politics at work with love.
xoxo
joce-lyn
1:14 AM
